Look ma! NO SOCKS!
When I was playing cards Friday night I kind of recognized this guy sitting at the table. He kept looking at me too. I asked him what he did for a living.. accountant...there you be. It was Bill, a friend of my sister Jen's. He said every time he saw me he was drunk at my sisters house. I said every time I saw him I was at my sisters house getting drunk. Now that we have met soberly, I should remember him next time. This is the mnemonic trick I tell guys to remember my name.
- Dammit Janet. Where's my shoes?
Mr.Sta just called. He is going to New York for Thanksgiving. I want to go to NewYork. If he would have told me he was going when he bought his tickets I would have gone with him. He said he called when he decided to go but that was when I was in Kansas. He's lying, no one called except the Good Dan when I was gone. They all lie. I told him due to the fact that he stands me up all of the time, I had to resort to using the Ken Doll and NOT him. Which is ok by me as Ken always knocks my socks off. Look ma! NO SOCKS! Mr.Sta gets demoted yet again for not putting out. He's been demoted before so it's not much of a problem as he knows that if he is really nice and I've been drinking and the Ken Doll slacks off on his duties again, I'll re-promote him.
Have I not explained to the TheNewGuy at work not to walk up behind me and look over my shoulder? Man is he pissing me off. I hate that. Hate it.
My ex-friend welfare mom Joybitch sent this. Normally all I get from her is crap mail. Have a nice day shit, smiley faces do-de-doe pages, stupid jokes, picture of herself and Sean (one of my ex-renters/co-workers/friends), chain emails, so she has almost made it to my auto delete list and then there's that whole drug and rape thing.
Joybitch & Sean
Over a year ago I was out with the boys from work at a sports bar. I was board as they were all watching SPORTS so I told them I would go over to the bar next door and grab a table. So I walk over to the dance bar and there are no tables available but the best table had two nice looking women sitting at it so I ask if I could sit with them.Glare from Joybitch.
I say, "really you WANT me to sit here because there are several good-looking young men who are coming over in a little bit". Joybitch relented and let me sit down. From the minute my friend Sean walked in she was determined to have him which was nothing to me as we were just friends anyway. Well Joybitch decides to be my bestest friend so she can get closer to Sean. We would go out every Friday night. I liked going out with her because guys would always buy our drinks as she was 105 pounds of boobs, but just a bitch. Took me a long time to get decent service at that place again because she was so rude to the waitress and bartender. Anyway, to make a long horrid story short. Sean and JoyBitch get married and now I am on her email crap list. You know how people who don't know how to forward shit right and you have to click through 8 other forwards to get to it? That's what she does. Very irritating.
Later kids,