Is / Was << 1st >>
November 12, 2003 - -

I need to shove my finger down my throat now

Well I called Ken Doll Tuesday night, so tell me how weak and pathetic I am. You can stick a fork in that relationship as well. I have told you lately that I hate you(men). I hate you.
My toilet was clogged the other day and I had to pee, but the water was almost to the rim so I had to unclog it before I could go. That's what self control is all about.
~Save Craig~

Except for SaveCraig - he seems to be ok. And Spanky, Lexxee, Sturge, Don, Satelitte Bob, Bingoguy, Fergie, Genghis-jon, Grimm, Leonmcphelps, Tvzero, Uncle Bob, Warmleftover, Fadein and Gutterpoet. But the rest of you.
    HATE. HATE. HATE.

Ok I called him again at 10:30 after I had a couple of beers in me. Got his voicemail. "I kind of miss you", says I. Yup, I must have been drinking. I need to shove my finger down my throat now. God I suck. No matter I'm in a good mood today even if I didn't get laid AGAIN.
In other news: I may have a new roommate: Tex. He is coming over tonight to see the room for rent. Even if he stays for 2 months that is still $800. I don't consider him doable but he says he cooks and cleans and I miss having a Housebitch. Just a sec...I need to check my lottery ticket first....crap. I didn't win the lottery again. There's another $2.00 down the toilet. Yup. I think I'm going to get me a roommate. Just for safety sake, I'm having Scary Dan come over for dinner tonight while I explain the house Rules.
Buford copped a feel last night at the bar. What's up with the old married guys at that bar where they think they can touch my girls? I chastised him but he was really drunk and maybe just couldn't resist touching one of them so I didn't yell or anything I just said, "Buford, that's not very platonic of you. You can't be touching my girls platonically." Myron always tells the same joke.
    Marriage is like a 3 ring circus
  • first there is the engagement RING
  • then there is the wedding RING
  • then there is the suffeRING
Myron laughs hysterically then. After about the 5th time I heard the joke I quit laughing. I smile at him just to be a good sport and not ruin the only thing in his life that makes him laugh. I like dive bars because my life is better then anyone else there. This guy Dennis wanted to take me home but I used the "I have a boyfriend who is out of town" lie which works because I can always say "I'm inclined to cheat on him" if I see something I like.
Canibal Confession. This is really sick. Really. Brought to you by: Indrid-cold
It's nice outside today. I woke up at 5:22am and watched the clock tick to 6:00 to make sure the alarm went off. That was kind of a waste of time. I would have had time to go rollering blading this morning but I was puttering around so I went during lunch.
Well golly gee. Mr.Sta just called and said it was his duty to SIZE-UP any proposed roommate so I have Dan & Mr.Sta & Tex coming over for dinner tonight. I recon I should have started cleaning the house instead of watching the clock tick this morning. DOH! MagicWhiskey
I was looking over the list of your gentlemen callers and now I'm wondering what the order form for Dr. Frankenstein would look like. If the final product was able to walk without that stiff joint look. And the stitch job was classier. And the bolts at the neck were gone. And he wasn't so green. No wait I'm thinking about that other green guy who get angry and big. Hey I wonder if his dick get bigger when he's angry too. Maybe I should go.
-------------------------------
boardho
If I could order one made:
  • Intellect of Scary Dan
  • Look of Ken Doll including his anatomically correctness
  • Mr.Sta's sense of humor, voice
  • Mr.Thorogh's stamina
  • Good Dan's man thing work ethic
  • Dumbass - well nothing there
  • Mr.Next2 - nothing there either
  • Mr.Porsche's money
    -------------------------------
    groovebunny
    Aww man I really need to try and look at men as housebitch material instead of potential mates for life. I'm sure that would make my life so much easier right there.
    -------------------------------
    Bingoguy
    Woohoo! I'm ok!
    -------------------------------
    Angela
    thanks for making me puke today with that cannibal story
    -------------------------------
    boardho
    I SAID it was really sick. Did you think I was lying? Were you expecting puppies and rainbows maybe when you clicked on a canibal confession link?
    -------------------------------

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  • Is / Was Profile Notes Guestbook Comments
    November 12, 2003
    I need to shove my finger down my throat now
    Well I called Ken Doll Tuesday night, so tell me how weak and pathetic I am. You can stick a fork in that relationship as well. I have told you lately that I hate you(men). I hate you.
    My toilet was clogged the other day and I had to pee, but the water was almost to the rim so I had to unclog it before I could go. That's what self control is all about.
    ~Save Craig~

    Except for SaveCraig - he seems to be ok. And Spanky, Lexxee, Sturge, Don, Satelitte Bob, Bingoguy, Fergie, Genghis-jon, Grimm, Leonmcphelps, Tvzero, Uncle Bob, Warmleftover, Fadein and Gutterpoet. But the rest of you.
    Ok I called him again at 10:30 after I had a couple of beers in me. Got his voicemail. "I kind of miss you", says I. Yup, I must have been drinking. I need to shove my finger down my throat now. God I suck. No matter I'm in a good mood today even if I didn't get laid AGAIN.
    In other news: I may have a new roommate: Tex. He is coming over tonight to see the room for rent. Even if he stays for 2 months that is still $800. I don't consider him doable but he says he cooks and cleans and I miss having a Housebitch. Just a sec...I need to check my lottery ticket first....crap. I didn't win the lottery again. There's another $2.00 down the toilet. Yup. I think I'm going to get me a roommate. Just for safety sake, I'm having Scary Dan come over for dinner tonight while I explain the house Rules.
    Buford copped a feel last night at the bar. What's up with the old married guys at that bar where they think they can touch my girls? I chastised him but he was really drunk and maybe just couldn't resist touching one of them so I didn't yell or anything I just said, "Buford, that's not very platonic of you. You can't be touching my girls platonically." Myron always tells the same joke. Myron laughs hysterically then. After about the 5th time I heard the joke I quit laughing. I smile at him just to be a good sport and not ruin the only thing in his life that makes him laugh. I like dive bars because my life is better then anyone else there. This guy Dennis wanted to take me home but I used the "I have a boyfriend who is out of town" lie which works because I can always say "I'm inclined to cheat on him" if I see something I like.
    Canibal Confession. This is really sick. Really. Brought to you by: Indrid-cold
    It's nice outside today. I woke up at 5:22am and watched the clock tick to 6:00 to make sure the alarm went off. That was kind of a waste of time. I would have had time to go rollering blading this morning but I was puttering around so I went during lunch.
    Well golly gee. Mr.Sta just called and said it was his duty to SIZE-UP any proposed roommate so I have Dan & Mr.Sta & Tex coming over for dinner tonight. I recon I should have started cleaning the house instead of watching the clock tick this morning. DOH! MagicWhiskey
    I was looking over the list of your gentlemen callers and now I'm wondering what the order form for Dr. Frankenstein would look like. If the final product was able to walk without that stiff joint look. And the stitch job was classier. And the bolts at the neck were gone. And he wasn't so green. No wait I'm thinking about that other green guy who get angry and big. Hey I wonder if his dick get bigger when he's angry too. Maybe I should go.
    -------------------------------
    boardho
    If I could order one made:
  • Intellect of Scary Dan
  • Look of Ken Doll including his anatomically correctness
  • Mr.Sta's sense of humor, voice
  • Mr.Thorogh's stamina
  • Good Dan's man thing work ethic
  • Dumbass - well nothing there
  • Mr.Next2 - nothing there either
  • Mr.Porsche's money
    -------------------------------
    groovebunny
    Aww man I really need to try and look at men as housebitch material instead of potential mates for life. I'm sure that would make my life so much easier right there.
    -------------------------------
    Bingoguy
    Woohoo! I'm ok!
    -------------------------------
    Angela
    thanks for making me puke today with that cannibal story
    -------------------------------
    boardho
    I SAID it was really sick. Did you think I was lying? Were you expecting puppies and rainbows maybe when you clicked on a canibal confession link?
    -------------------------------